The Two Times I Ugly Cried Into A Pillow

There are two times I’ve absolutely sobbed into a pillow during this adventure I call writing.

Incident #1:
When I submitted the first draft of The Cord Between Two Queens (Book I) to my editor and got it back looking like a crime scene of red comments.
Over 1,000 notes.
Every. Single. Page.
I cried for three days straight and then spent four more days patching my ego together with caffeine and delusion.

Incident #2:
Launch week.
The dopamine was dopamin-ing.
I watched my Amazon rank climb, my name hit a Top 10 list, and my serotonin levels did a backflip.
I was on cloud nine.
Then, a week later… BOOM. Numbers dropped. Mood dropped. Self-esteem packed its bags and moved to the basement.

Imperfection became my sword and somehow, I was the one bleeding.

But here’s why I’m telling you this (besides the fact that I clearly have no chill):

Somewhere in the middle of that beautiful mess, I realized something.

Gratitude is a choice.
And sometimes, it’s the only thing that keeps you from eating your feelings and rage-refreshing your sales dashboard.

When I finally processed all those big feelings, I remembered—I am surrounded by incredible people.

People who showed up.
Who believed.
Who rallied.

And that includes you.

So from the bottom of my overly caffeinated heart:
Thank you for being here.
Thank you for reminding me that success isn’t just in the numbers—
It’s in the connection.

And speaking of connection, I was able to connect with an author named Gwyneth Lesley. Her book “Odette’s Vow” is what I’m reading now! If you’re interested, click this link for more info!

With love, laughter, and a side of shadow light,
💋 The Real RoBé

The Real RoBé

I write fantasy with sex, slaughter, and a splash of spiritual warfare—basically, foreplay with swords. My worlds are packed with tension, betrayal, and enough slow burns to set kingdoms on fire. Expect enemies-to-lovers, love triangles, forced proximity, deadly trials, and the kind of sexy tension that feels like war.

When I’m not torturing fictional characters, I’m wrangling a kid, a husband, two Mini Aussies, and a pair of beta fish who judge me daily. I love drinking high tea, but only if I can spike it.

Photography by: ERC Photography LLC (Evie Richards-Cashman)